Category Archives: Leadership

How To Lead Yourself and Increase Your Sphere of Influence?

You can easily  Lead ourselves and impact instantly our surroundings!!!

But First Lao-Tzu in the The Way of Life said that “It is wisdom to know others;It is enlightenment to know one’s self.”

One key about the way  we’re influenced depends on our frame of reference. All of us are lead one  way or another. We’re lead either through an internal frame of reference or an external frame of reference or maybe a combination of both(in that case it’s important to know which lead is first).

What  does that mean?

As we discussed in earlier podcast(particularly about emotional targeting). Most of us are raised in “cause-effect”  chain of motion into our actions. Which means a lot of us are raised into  “action” by looking  at external circumstances. Most people would act based on their neighbors( Isn’t it where the  expression ” keeping up with the  jones” also comes from?). As social creature, human beings need confirmation from their peers to “validate” their choices.

Advertisement and psychologist have understood that in human beings , and use this, as  method to lead and influence people. This is for example where the power of “Association” is hugely used (it’s not a chance  that big companies pay huge fortune for endorsements to big stars in entertainment or sports etc…)

The idea is that many people are influenced by external frame of reference. How relevant is this?

When you are a leader of a group you need to be aware of that so you can move some people into action by using this aspect; or if you have some products/services that you know can help people, using testimonials is a way to move and lead some people to adhere to your products/services. As manager or leader of an organization, when you hire for a leadership or a position where you need “maintenance” on a certain goal or task, you need to hire people with external frame of reference;as they would need to keep doing what already works and they would need always confirmation from their peer or manager.

A simple question is to ask while hiring the individual is the following:

“How do you know when you’ve done a good job?”

people with external frame of reference will say- when I get  positive feedback etc…

While people with internal frame of reference would not worry much about people feedback an they would likely say- I know it when I ‘ve done a good job.  People with internal frame of reference are usually self starter an can move themselves based their own believes. They are comfortable moving into new spaces and exploring new territory based on their internal beliefs and conviction; that would be the case of most of the mavericks, explorers, or pioneers.

There’s no wrong, or bad answer.The idea here is to know what your tendency is. The reality is that both  are useful. The key is to know where you stand and in what context ? You can lead yourself or your team based on the context. If you are strongly external frame reference, you can look for “successful” and inspiring examples  that will motivate and inspire you.

Similarly if you are primarily internal frame of reference , you’ll have to keep your vision in front of you so you are driven by your own beliefs.

The application of the internal/external frame of reference are enormous and can be used to lead self or people around you.

It can be used to better understand people around you.

Even with your spouse? one easy question is to ask”how do you know when you feel love?”

The applications are huge if properly understood.

Now for your homework:) what is your frame of reference?

Are you mainly internal, external or both(in that case which one lead?)

Also find out the frame of reference of the two person closest to you.

Both at work and in your personal life.

Until Next time, live your power with purpose and passion

 

 

 

What Trigger People to Feel a Certain Way, part 2

We can predict the way we want to feel in many ways!!! Taking control of our emotional state is so important in our daily lives.

How to take control of that?

In a previous posting we discussed about how everybody has a different set of anchors whether it be a certain song, or a certain fragrance or maybe a certain picture?  Each of us have certain triggers that make us feel a certain way? Are you aware of these triggers? If not I highly suggest to check the previous podcast and blog..

Awareness is the  first step to transmuting your destiny…

Now that we have identified our anchors, why don’t we design anchors we want.. yes   Anchors have many applications such as

Accessing resourceful state in ANY situation.. As   a performer ( ie. artist, teacher,sport person ,Doctors, sales etc), one has to perform at its best game…being able to access optimal state will be very helpful.

Condition responses in a different way that you  used to react(ie. in a relationship, if you know your spouse scream regularly and you can’t tolerate that? can you anchor yourself to respond differently- absolutely you can.. an intellectual knowledge is not enough. the anchor creation can allow you to design it at will.

Be in control of your emotional state at all times, move from procrastination to motivation, create positive association with co-workers etc…

How can I do that?  Here are 5 keys

5 keys to design and create an anchor.

1-Timing.

Make sure  you are in a desired state and not in mixed feeling state. ie for example you are happy and empty not thinking/feeling about anything else.

Intensity

Make sure you are in a heightened emotional phase. because our brain and nervous strive on emotion. the higher the emotion, the more powerful  the impact in creating new neural connection and association.

Uniqueness.

The brain learn out of mistake and unique information(as it has to learn to self preserve itself). and also the idea that anchors have to have an effect and we don’t want them be diluted.

Repeatable

You have to be able to  repeat.It shouldn’t be a one time wonder 🙂

You have to be able  to replicate it..

and of course

Repetition and Volume

Like in the Pavlov dog example, the more often  we condition ourselves, the more its get molded.. this is proven in all sciences.. Malcolm Gladwell talk about he 10000 hours expertise to be a master. In fact it’s the way we get most our belief while we’re kids.. a certain beliefs/behaviors are repeated upon us , over and over and over again until it become a habit..

Now you know , the factors that are involved into deigning an anchor.

Homework for next time

Decide on one anchor you want to create.. What is one  anchor you want to create that  if executed properly would change your daily productivity?

Till next time, Live Your Power with Purpose and Passion

 

What trigger us to feel a specific way?

In the previous post we discussed what an emotional target is.

The emotional target is a systemic approach and way that allow you to “feel” a specific desire emotion at any given time.

here we’ l l discuss about ANCHOR!!

The idea is to systemically build it into our nervous system so we can trigger it at will.It seems lunatic isn’t it?

But it’s not!! Follow me here for a second. In previous posting we discussed how the brain does 3 things because of the Excessive amount of data we receive on a daily basis. The brain Delete, Distort or Generalize information in order to be able to handle the 2 billion of data per second it’s bombarded by.

Part of the “optimization” done by our brain is to simplify so it can be effective and efficient, so it classifies.

So an anchor is a trigger which is based on a link between a specific stimulus and a response or state.It’s basically a neurological association.The most famous example of anchoring is described in the experiments of Ivan Pavlov. Every time he fed his dog, he simulteaously rang a bell or a tuning fork, and that time his dog would salivate and be excited… he did the experiment many times…

And then even when there was no food, but he would ring that bell, the dog would salivate!!==> ringing the bell was the anchor

Basically, Anchoring is the process of creating neurological associations by applying a specific stimulus to one or more of the five senses while the person is in an associated, heightened state.

So Anchoring gives quick access to any past emotional state, so that someone can experience that state at any time that they choose.

We can also have unconscious anchor in our lives during which a particular stimulus is either intense, or repetitive or both in a way;

Most of the time anchors are created in two ways.

Intensity of a state – As an individual is in a heightened emotional state while a specific stimulus is experienced, the two become linked.

Repetition of a stimulus over many hours or days. When a particular experience occurs with such

Regularity that the individual links the stimulus automatically to the simultaneously occurring state.

As you can imagine we all have anchors in our lives.

They are all around us; based on your dominant five senses (Kinesthetic, Auditory, Visual, Olfactory, Gustatory), We all have those anchors (listen in the podcast to hear more..

Part of the homework before next week podcast is for you to look at your daily life and find anchor in each 5 sense in your life?

Is it a particular smell? Music? What is it?

Next week will be amazing as we will learn how to that…

Until then, Live your power with purpose and passion

How to Feel the Way You Want to Feel Part 2?

As we discussed in last episode and posting we discussed how our “rules” frame what triggers us into generating our feeling.

The revealing question to uncover those rules “What has to happen in order for me to feel joy (for example) Etc.…

Exploring the rules that trigger our emotion is SO IMPORTANT, that I hope you will be listening to this podcast couple times. Late former disciple of Freud, Carl Jung said-There can be no transforming of darkness into light and of apathy into movement without emotion.”CARL JUNG.Indeed emotions are the fuel to our lives and our actions, so understanding them is so crucial.

It’s imperative to remind ourselves about the fact that we do our emotions. ? We are at the source of all our emotions; we create them.Indeed, Emotions, even those that seem painful in the short term, are truly like an internal compass that points people toward the actions we must take to arrive at our goals.

So many of us feel that we have to wait for certain experiences in order to feel the emotions we desire. We’re always waiting for the right person, the right situation, the right combination to come along before we feel good.As an example, some people don’t give themselves permission to feel loved, happy or confident unless a particular set of expectations is met.

In reality, who determines whether this is the right person or situation?

Let’s face it, when you do feel good, who’s making you feel good? You are!!! Not the person or the situation. What is happening is that, we simply have rules/filters we have developed and build per our beliefs system that says we have to wait until X, Y and Z C occur before we allow ourselves to feel good.

You know  what the good news is my friend?

You can feel any way you choose at any moment in time.

Yes even for people addicted to drugs or narcotics. Our brain has neuro-transmitter that are triggered based on our filters, which make our body secrets hormones like (dopamine in case of joy as an example)…etc…

So the exciting news is this principle that we can create our emotion. Why wait for them and NOT create them a will. This is the WHOLE premise of Emotional target.

We want to “reproduce” at will, feeling we want to experience.

Because in the example in the example of joy, love, or gratitude, why wait for events to “confirm” our rules? Why not build our own rules so that we can feel what we want to feel?

Unlike animals we can design that for ourselves. That’s what the wise men have called paradise on earth; if you grasp this nuance and apply it, not only theoretically, but also practice it, it will change your life…

To close the loop, let’s refresh ourselves that our perceptions are controlled by what we focus on and the meanings we give or interpret from things. And No doubt, like Tony Robbins teaches we can change our perception in a moment, just by changing the way we use our physiology or by asking different or better question.

I invite you to ask yourself this question-What do I really want to feel?

What would I have to believe in order to feel the way I’ve been feeling?

This is your homework before next week practical podcast where we roll up our sleeve to really determine/set some of our new rules.

Till next time, live your power with purpose and passion

How to Feel What You Want to Feel? Part 1

We discussed how our perception is driven by our filters. One major filter that determine the way we feel and act is our rules.

We all experience on a daily basis top 10-12 emotions on a frequent basis. And better yet  2-3 emotions that are dominant in our daily lives!!! What are yours? Is it anxiety? Is it serenity?  Centeredness? Is it suspicious? Is it poor me? Is it regret? Is it outraged? Is it cool? Is it hypocrite? Is it playful? Is it wholeness?  Whatever that it is it is important to identify them and master them so that you can change them or amplifies them.

The bottom line is that anything we want to do, have, be or experience in our lives is because at the end there’s a feeling, an emotion we want to experience…whether it  is having a new car, a new house, a family, or doing something exciting or being a certain way or hanging out with friends.

So the easiest way to determine some way we want to feel is to identify our top rules.

Key question to ask is “What has to happen in order for me to feel “peaceful”, what has to happen in order for me to feel confident…

That key question will drive you to understand the “conditions” you have molded your subconscious to be triggered. The conditions here are actions/behaviors which are judgment made by our perceptions (through our filters) of the events.

The conditions are your rules that have been stamped into your brain since childhood or from significant emotional events.

For example in order for me to feel happy, I need to feel “wholeness”..etc..

So the major work is to dig deeper so that you can identify a “simple” condition that make you feel a certain way based on the conditions.

For example what has to happen for you in order for you to feel “empowered”?

In there you will discover if you are internal filter driven or external filter driven… For example do you have to have someone approval in order for you to know that you have done a great job? Or you do know within yourself when you have done a good job? This can be a key question when you hire a leader/manager in your team? If the candidate is self driven etc..

The next level of our rules is the Must/should…

The “should” are most generated and created by our environment. The should burden us a lot . the should are “apps” that are running in our background and that makes run slow in our daily activities. The “should” are slowing down the human processors- Like when  many applications are  opened on our computer , the computer slow down it’s processing power. In Human being the “should” are  the voice of critics, norms,.  It does slow down,the actions in us. CUT down your should if you want to be more powerful and less burdened!!!

Then there is the “must” which is a higher level that commands a stronger feeling of what we ought to do or be… when a should become a must, we act and we move!!

What are your “should “and “must”?

Homework is to find out with your top 2-3 emotions, what are your top 2-3 rules you have built and molded for yourself?

Let’s say you experience anxiety daily? What has to happen for you to “feel” anxious?”;What has to happen for you feel confident …?

Till then, live your power with purpose and passion

HOW WE FEEL, ROCK OUR WORLD!!!

In this Post, we are continuing on Understanding the Human machine control part 2 theme!!I hope it’s  clear by now that our vibe, or electromagnetic energy that we project is a combination of both what we think/believe and  how we feel.

Let’s start to explore the Emotion landscape.Emotion, is “E”motion indeed, it’s Energy in Motion.

“What is a feeling and an emotion , how is created?  can we control it?

We do our emotions!! emotions don’t happen to us!!

In fact the TRIAD suggested by Tony Robins is a good example to illustrate on how the 3 molders of meaning (Physiology, Language and Focus), Influence and almost determine on a short term how we feel. The state of each of these 3 elements determine our state and how we feel. So if you wan to control how you feel; the easiest way is to change one of these 3 stated above.That’s why for example after working out we feel upbeat or better? or after listening to a song  our physiology change when we start moving and our state changes..

But on a long term it’s our filters and our beliefs.

But let’s look at our emotional state.which is is a physical sensation.

For example let’s stay  the emotion and feeling of “pleasure”; that emotion is triggered by hormones we secret in our body- mostly our organs (in this case in our brain secret dopamine let’s say). Dopamine triggered by neurotransmitter which are in our human lymbic brain. the negro-transmitter are triggered based on the “interpretation/perception of events  in our environment”.

Basically our perception control the  signal that is triggered by our neurotransmitter.

Our perception are determined  by our filters. Part of our filters are determined  by the  meaning we associate to events.

The meaning  and the association we attach to events is the basis of our filters. One of the leading filter is our VALUES.

Our values are being driven by our rules.for example , let’s say friendship is one of your highest value.

When you think about it, each of us have RULES about  for example what friendship means.

So our rules drive how we feel in the long term and consistent basis.So Homework is this:

What are your top 2-3  VALUES and what are your top 2-3 rules around this VALUES. The easiest way to find out about your rules is to ask yourself this question:

“WHAT HAS TO HAPPEN IN ORDER FOR ME TO FEEL FRIENDSHIP WITH SOMEONE?”

I hope you do the homework..these are important  to know yourself so you can transmute your destiny…

Until next time, live your power with passion and purpose

Let me your thoughts and feel free to share..

 

Understanding the Human Control Machine- Part 2!!!!

Anything  Created in our plane and dimension has been created twice and it’s a 3 phase process. The first part  is the inception phase which  involves a moving forward, an expansion motion. Like an arrow, it involves being targeted, it involves having a  direction, being intentional, like  an electric charge  field it directs .For example Chinese tradition called  it YAN-(cf,to yin-yan),  or the male element.it’s the assertive.To be more visual it’s like the arrow, well represented even  in  the  human male  organ of reproduction as in the phallus.

The second  phase after the inception is  the gestation phase.In the gestation phase the  necessary element  in structure and function is the surrender element. The accepting part, the integrative part, like the bow, that part has to relax, to accept , to give in. like the Warrior with the bow which is a flexible arc which shoots aerodynamic projectiles called arrow- the bow has to be supple , open, accepting. in order for the gestation to last, acceptance . That’s the female element- the YIN.

That element in human is OUR EMOTIONS!!!  That’s the feedback  System in the Human control machine. Our body is the vehicle that stores our emotions; which means our body through the use of our nervous  system(which is the bridge between the brain-neural network) capture the emotional field of what we perceive.It’s our magnetic field.

The 3rd phase in the creation is the birth process. Which is manifestation phase. the alignment phase..the coherence and resonance phase.

No need to repeat the energetic nature of our universe, as it’s been demonstrated by quantum  physics;everything resonates and has a vibration. Everything is energy.In fact 99.99%  of the universe is all made of energy. the “material” plane that we perceive is a tiny part of what IS..and even that part is energy vibrating at a slower vibration.

As above so below, so below as above. We are part of this universe and it is clear that we create through our electromagnetic field– Which is combining our filters(thoughts, beliefs) AND our EMOTIONS. Different school of  thoughts have promoted one (BELIEFS )or the other( EMOTIONS). That’s  not accurate. We need both to create and transform. we need our unique ELECTROMAGNETIC signature to match the  vibration of the state,the energy, the frequency of what we want manifested.

In fact anything we want to experience, have, do,  or be in our lives is a feeling and an emotion at the end. The car, the charity, we give, the children we raise, the medal, the trophy. The lasting sensation is who we become in the journey.That emotion/feeling is what we’re after..

Would it makes to understand how to get it? In the next post we’ll discuss about that..

Listen in the podcast to learn more about the homework and the next blog, next week.

Let me me know your thoughts,  and feel  free to subscribe to the podcast as well. on iTunes or stitcher radio..

Until next time, Live your power with purpose and passion

Soul

Understanding the Human Control Machine!!!!

Albert Einstein said “God doesn’t play with Dice” while  looking at  the universe, its pattern and the world. What a statement of profound humility from one of the most respected brain of of human history. In fact He learned enough science to understand the why and much of the how. He could see the consistency and relationship between all things. Thus, to him, nothing was random chance. Truth is absolute and works every time!

As above so below, So below as above… The same wonder and conclusion can be drawn when looking at the human mind.

From a builder/designer perspective, let’s dive into our mind.

When one creates a product (i.e a car, phone, telephone etc..), the creator always ask 3 fundamentals questions: THE WHAT, THE WHY, and the HOW.

Fair  enough our brain is wired that way.

The WHAT-2 States- SURVIVAL or CREATION

Our brain is ALWAYS in one of this binary state. there’s no in between.Indeed we’re either growing or dying.

Dying is restriction, shrinking, constraint, it’s survival. VS. Creation  which is growth, expansion, aliveness, movement .

THE WHY-THE  INTENTION

The revelation here is to understand that no matter what our actions are, every human being has a POSITIVE INTENT. the action or behavior could be damaging to its surrounding, but ultimately, the intent is positive… really? why..

Ultimately, our mind intent is always one these 3 things:

Protect, Prevent or Provide.

Which means when people act they have one these intent(consciously or unconsciously)

THE HOW-THE OPERATION, THE SIMPLIFICATION,THE OPTIMIZATION

As we discussed in the last post (your perceptions create your reality),  our mind is exposed to 2 Millions bit of information each

second; while the brain can process only about 120 bit of information/second. Which means the brain to be optimal operates 3 modes(Delete, Distort or Generalize).

Very fascinating isn’t it ? Nature might not be random after all?

Or is it random?

Before you answer this question, I’m inviting you to look at your daily actions the next seven days(work and domestic environment).

Can you identify 3 behaviors/actions where you apply the WHAT, WHY and the HOW. Even better can you deliberately design patterns?

What do you think?

Listen in the audio for more details!!

Until next time,Live your Power with Purpose and Passion

 

Your Perception Creates Your Reality

In this posting we reviewed the human need psychology(uncovered by Tony Robbins). The idea that  all human have 6 basics need that drive and underline any action or decision we take.

In  summary it’s basically the fact that our  beliefs are related to our emotions and our emotions are based on our physiology, our focus and the meaning we give to events.

Well In this episode, We shared  the fact that Human beings are bombarded with 2 Millions bit of information per second( yes you read read it correctly(2.000.000 bit /sec). In my personal opinion  it’s even more than that, with the new  digital age  and 24 hour cycle of news we live in.

Why is this relevant?

The fact is that Human being can ONLY process on average 120 bit/sec. So what that means for us?

Very simple, it means we don’t and we cannot process ALL the data around us or coming at us at any given moment; therefore our brain has to make sense of this information somehow in order for us to survive and function properly!! yes our brain does three things at any given time.

Our brain Delete information, Distort or Generalize in order for us  to make sense of the info coming at us at any given moment. In neuroscience they call it the R.A.S or the reticular activating system. Basically our brain creates a framework based on our internal filters(beliefs, values, our memories etc….). Have  you ever bought a new car to only notice that in the traffic everybody has that car or you happen to notice more of your car brand , model and style?

Yes it happens to all of us ..it’s your R.A.S at work.. Similarly in our daily lives, any actions, decisions or observations we make is highly FILTERED by our FRAME or our PERCEPTION. This is why when a same event happens, two people have a slightly different interpretation of it.

This is why our perception shapes our reality!!

The second relevance of this is about quantum physics!!! the fact that there are a lot of information  and possibilities out there. And the  fact that the observers  are the ones choosing to bring the reality they “observe”… Which is very exciting if you grasp the two concept discuss here!!

When you listen to the podcast, I’m suggesting for you participate and do a homework.. which will help you to start taking charge of your destiny as what we do is to help people transmute their destiny…

Enjoy the listening and talk to you next time.

Self-knowledge is the beginning of self-improvement

The object of all life is development; and everything that lives has an inalienable right to all development it is capable of attaining. Man’s right to life means his right to have the free and unrestricted use of all things which be necessary to his fullest mental, spiritual and physical unfoldment- Wallace D Wattles.

This statement is so dear to my heart that I believe that you deserve to live your best life.Your Life matters.In order to make your life matter.it’s important to understand yourself. how do you define yourself ?

Let’s pause for a minute? How do you define yourself? A mother? father? a brother,sister, a father, daughter, a friend , doctor? Do you define yourself by your role or by your profession, by your gender? by your race? by your environment? by your hobbies? well it’s very simple, your personality defines your personal reality (as  would say Dr .Joe Dispenza).

Regardless, some people want to have a great romantic relationship.  Others  may want success and results in business.  Some people want to contribute to others.  Some want to be better parents.  There are those that want to be healthy and energetic.  Some may want people want all of this?  What beliefs and emotions are  driving you? our beliefs are related to our emotions and our emotions are based on our physiology, our focus and the meaning we give to events.  Tony Robbins  call it the Triad

In this section and podcast we explore how we’re all  driven by 6 human needs develop and suggested by Tony Robbins.