We discussed how our perception is driven by our filters. One major filter that determine the way we feel and act is our rules.
We all experience on a daily basis top 10-12 emotions on a frequent basis. And better yet 2-3 emotions that are dominant in our daily lives!!! What are yours? Is it anxiety? Is it serenity? Centeredness? Is it suspicious? Is it poor me? Is it regret? Is it outraged? Is it cool? Is it hypocrite? Is it playful? Is it wholeness? Whatever that it is it is important to identify them and master them so that you can change them or amplifies them.
The bottom line is that anything we want to do, have, be or experience in our lives is because at the end there’s a feeling, an emotion we want to experience…whether it is having a new car, a new house, a family, or doing something exciting or being a certain way or hanging out with friends.
So the easiest way to determine some way we want to feel is to identify our top rules.
Key question to ask is “What has to happen in order for me to feel “peaceful”, what has to happen in order for me to feel confident…
That key question will drive you to understand the “conditions” you have molded your subconscious to be triggered. The conditions here are actions/behaviors which are judgment made by our perceptions (through our filters) of the events.
The conditions are your rules that have been stamped into your brain since childhood or from significant emotional events.
For example in order for me to feel happy, I need to feel “wholeness”..etc..
So the major work is to dig deeper so that you can identify a “simple” condition that make you feel a certain way based on the conditions.
For example what has to happen for you in order for you to feel “empowered”?
In there you will discover if you are internal filter driven or external filter driven… For example do you have to have someone approval in order for you to know that you have done a great job? Or you do know within yourself when you have done a good job? This can be a key question when you hire a leader/manager in your team? If the candidate is self driven etc..
The next level of our rules is the Must/should…
The “should” are most generated and created by our environment. The should burden us a lot . the should are “apps” that are running in our background and that makes run slow in our daily activities. The “should” are slowing down the human processors- Like when many applications are opened on our computer , the computer slow down it’s processing power. In Human being the “should” are the voice of critics, norms,. It does slow down,the actions in us. CUT down your should if you want to be more powerful and less burdened!!!
Then there is the “must” which is a higher level that commands a stronger feeling of what we ought to do or be… when a should become a must, we act and we move!!
What are your “should “and “must”?
Homework is to find out with your top 2-3 emotions, what are your top 2-3 rules you have built and molded for yourself?
Let’s say you experience anxiety daily? What has to happen for you to “feel” anxious?”;What has to happen for you feel confident …?
Till then, live your power with purpose and passion